Online Dating Definitions

One of our favorite sources for online dating information is Julie Spira, the Cyber-Dating Expert (  Julie is an “in the trenches” writer who chronicles her real-life dating experiences.  She recently put together a list of “what they say vs. what they mean” for those who carefully weigh the self-authored descriptions on dating sites before making the decision to contact a potential match.  It’s pretty funny!

WHAT THEY SAY - Male: 5’7″

WHAT THEY MEAN – Male: 5’5″ or less


WHAT THEY SAY - Male: Wearing baseball hat

WHAT THEY MEAN - Male: Bald or little hair


WHAT THEY SAY - Anyone: No photo

WHAT THEY MEAN - Anyone: Not attractive


WHAT THEY SAY - Female: Age 36-39

WHAT THEY MEAN - Female: Age 40-50


WHAT THEY SAY - Female: Weight 135 pounds

WHAT THEY MEAN - Female: Weight over 150 pounds


WHAT THEY SAY - Male or Female: No weight listed

WHAT THEY MEAN - Male or Female: You don’t want to know


WHAT THEY SAY - Male: No income stated

WHAT THEY MEAN - Male: I can’t afford you


WHAT THEY SAY - Female: No income stated

WHAT THEY MEAN - Female: It doesn’t matter


WHAT THEY SAY - Male: Coffee dates only

WHAT THEY MEAN - Male: Been doing this for too long. You may not be worth lunch or dinner.


WHAT THEY SAY - Female: Coffee dates only

WHAT THEY MEAN - Female: I have other dates booked for lunch and dinner


WHAT THEY SAY - Male: Separated

WHAT THEY MEAN - Male: Married and unavailable


WHAT THEY SAY - Female: Separated

WHAT THEY MEAN - Female: I want to have sex and will you pay for my divorce?


CAUTION: Don’t let this humorous compendium unfairly put you off from using an online dating service.  Our research has shown it is the #1 way that Suddenly Solo’s who are in a relationship meet (followed by personal referrals).

1 Comment


    When they say
    men- NO DRAMA
    What they mean
    men- I really don’t want to discuss your feelings

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